I came across this little gem.here. I found it so painfully true that I asked her permission to steal it. I don't play on Facebook so would not have found it for myself.
I am shouting loudly. ' It is true, true I tell you!' I would prefer not to have known these people (many of them relatives) at all. Sadly I did and do know them. For some years now I have been running a kind of personal audit to ensure I don't become them. In a sick sort of way it is nice to know that I am not alone.
I cannot see it on your post here, EC, so I went over to the original place and I have to say I agree with you. There are some people I would rather not know, and some of them I am related to, so I am forced to associate with them, but I don't have to like them. Hugs to you.
ReplyDeleteDJan: Its sad having relatives that we would never, under any circumstance, associate with. Hugs to you as well.
DeleteI couldn't see it either, EC but I headed over and found your friend's blog and it was lovely (the blog) and her sentiments about difficult people were bang on. Thanks for the link!!
ReplyDeleteCathy Oliffe-Webster: It is a lovely blog and I think she puts a more positive take on the image than I can manage.
Deletefinding the 'teachable' element of any situation is a gift. "...I have been running a kind of personal audit to ensure I don't become them." and more than just recognizing it, you have nailed exactly what it takes to avoid letting it happen.
ReplyDeletethanks for sharing this one (i couldn't see the pic in your post, either, and went to the sourceblog). needed it today.
daisyfae: I am glad to be of service.
DeleteThank you one and all for telling me the image wasn't there. I hope I have fixed it now.
ReplyDeleteVery nice and I can certainly relate to this. Sad but true. I'm thankful for the friends I have since many of my relatives are not people I"d prefer to associate with.
ReplyDeleteJenn June: I would certainly not have chosen to associate with several members of my family.
Deleteyeah, what they all said....
ReplyDelete:)
Sherri: Glad you agree. Hope the beast is leaving you alone.
DeleteVery true E'sC . . . . I've learnt a lot from my family about how not to be.
ReplyDeleteI popped back to comment on the beautiful daisies and your amazing ability to "zone in" on the weeds and "out of" the pain. (previous post) so whilst I'm here, I think you and your garden are full of wonder. Take care x
bugerlugs63: It seems that my sad truth is almost a universal sad truth. Thank you re the garden.
DeleteThere is so much truth and wisdom there! It's especially true when dealing with familial traits (my grandmother was a terror) but it's true across the board too.
ReplyDeleteMelissa Ann Goodwin: It is true. It is helpful. I have never seen it so succinctly worded before.
DeleteThis is so true, unfortunately, and even more unfortunately, so true of family. There are times when I like to believe that I was an only child... could have been.... should have been...
ReplyDeleteCindi: I would certainly have pruned a few of my siblings, but also my progenitors. Difficult.
DeleteHow very true!
ReplyDeleteWarm Aloha from Waikiki
Comfort Spiral
> < } } (°>
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Cloudia: I am becoming a little frightened about just how many people this is true for. Sigh.
Deleteyep..but we can learn something from everyone., even if it the behavior we do not want to copy!
ReplyDeleteI am your newest follower..pls follow back if you can.
momto8: Thank you. I will be over to visit you shortly.
DeleteThis so resonates, today of all days. I came home after church, despairing of all the mean-spiritedness and pettiness in my congregation. Thank you. I am stealing this image--I hope it goes viral. peace...
ReplyDeleteLinda: It resonated so strongly with me that I also had to take it from the place I found it. And it seems that a lot of other people see the sad truth in it as well.
DeleteHi EC! Great post and it IS sad how many people have family members they rather not be around. I can truly say that for the most part, my family does NOT fit into that category! You're very intuitive and a strong woman to know you ARE NOT and WILL NOT be like them! Good for you! Hugs...
ReplyDeleteBecky: I am glad that you don't have family that you can describe in this way. Thank you for your vote of confidence in my strength.
DeleteIt's totally true - especially about them being relatives!
ReplyDeleteRiot Kitty: Sad isn't it?
DeleteIf they're difficult, and the opposite of difficult is easy, then are you saying you want to grow up to be easy?
ReplyDeleteIt's late and that's probably funnier to me than it should be. But it is a good message!
John Wiswell: Difficult people is a much nicer way of saying total toads. And that is a euphemism too. And I woulld prefer to grow up to be easy than to be some of these difficult people. Which sounds as if I have no sense of humour at all. Sigh.
DeleteYep!, i agree with that statement. I'm trying very hard not to turn into my parents with their old fashioned and negative ways :-).
ReplyDeleteWindsmoke: Old fashioned is one thing, negative is another isn't it? Thanks.
DeleteYes - so true!
ReplyDeleteladyfi: There seem to be far more people who recognise the truth of this statement, than the fortunate others.
DeleteDefinately, i agree with that. it is sad in a sense though, that there are so many people in the world that can show you why you don't want to be like them..
ReplyDeleteCatherine, ex oh mwah!: Goodness your blog name is a fingerful to type. There are of course always the others too - the ones who inspire. There just seem to be less of them.
DeleteI'm also thankful to the people I've known throughout my life, for helping mt to become the person I am today. Myself. Individual. Nothing at all like some of "them".
ReplyDeleteRiver: Yes. Something all of us have to be thankful for it seems.
DeleteWonderful! Love it, so true.
ReplyDeleteDave King: It is, isn't it?
DeleteWe all have relatives like that (one control freak comes to mind) - thanks for sharing this. You are so wonderful that I think we don't have to worry about you.
ReplyDeleteLynn: Thank you. It seems that far too many of us do have relatives in this category. I really worry about turning into at least two of my nightmares. I hope not, but do maintain constant vigilance.
DeleteI get this... O how much do I get this!!! Relatives are a trial. But I have been lucky enough to learn not to become them. I hope.
ReplyDeleteChristine: From the person I see through your blog, you have escaped becoming those people.
DeleteGosh Thankyou!!
DeleteYou are, most certainly, not alone.
ReplyDeleteKath: Thank you.
DeleteLove it! Certainly have come across a few of those myself lately....
ReplyDeleteDorothy Krajewski: It seems that far too many of us know these people.
DeleteThat statement is certainly true. When I was going through some therapy several years ago, one of friends commented, "Isn't it interesting how the more sane you become, the people around you seem more insane?" :)
ReplyDeleteLynn: Oh yes.
DeleteSeems to be a universally accepted truth!
ReplyDeleteOne Minnesota Writer: An almost universal truth. Becky comments that she has luckily escaped and a friend of mine felt that difficult people were the interesting ones in this world. Different definitions of difficult I think. I hope.
DeleteThe statement gives us a reason to improve ourselves
ReplyDeleteKim @ Stuff: A reason and a need.
DeleteIndeed and this teaches us to find the positive from the negative and try to be happy with who we are.
ReplyDeleteAlthough, I have found the need to distance myself from the difficult people in my life who tried to sabotage my right to happiness due to their own insecurities.
In kindness, Gary
Gary: Blogger is having a small hissy fit and refusing to allow me to reply to your comment.
ReplyDeleteI have certainly distanced myself from people who as you say 'sabotage my right to happiness...'. In addition I monitor my own behaviour to ensure I do not become a person like them.
It's really true. I've learned a lot from people who do the wrong things. Maybe more than from the gooduns.
ReplyDeleteAustan: I would like to think that my behaviour is changed by the inspirational people I hear about/read about and more rarely come across. Sadly it the wronguns who have the power to alter my behaviour too.
DeleteSuch a great statement! I hope that I don't become one of those difficult people when I am old.
ReplyDeleteSusan Kane: It is a really scary thought - I hope that none of us become these people.
DeleteTrue true - and judging by the response here, more widespread than I'd hoped. Either there are more of these types out there, or we are all running afoul of the same few "instructively" rotten people!
ReplyDeleteBy the way, consider yourself (or your blog) officially voted for.
Two Tigers: Thank you. Given our geographical spread I think there are far more of these types of people out there than I am comfortable with. Sigh.
DeleteMy first thought was of some of the teachers my kids had in school. Most were dedicated and did the best they could, but others - well, the best I could find to say about them when they were blatantly unkind or unfair was that we learn something from everyone, even if that something is just what the wrong thing is to do.
ReplyDeleteI think with the right attitude we learn from both the good examples and the bad, not only from family but from all those who are in our lives.
jenno_o: It is always nice to see you here. I think you are right and we learn from everyone, but the hard lessons are often the ones that stick.
DeleteHaving negative or toxic people in our lives does serve as a good reminder for us to remember the importance of practicing kindness and generosity of spirit. :)
ReplyDeleteSuper Earthling: You are so right, and I do strive not to become the toxic people I have known.
ReplyDeleteI like the way you think, especially the last one. I am thankful for wonderful bloggers such as you EC.
ReplyDeleteThe eternal optimist that I am I choose to believe there are more good people in this world than bad. But sadly we hear so much more about the bad.
Hope you and SP are, and stay well and happy :)
Pam: Thank you very much.
DeleteHaving "anti" role models does have its advantages if you know how to use them...
ReplyDeleteRon Dudley: They have to have some use after all.
DeleteSpot on. And it ties in very nicely with my last post too.
ReplyDeleteAll Consuming: Thank you, and it does indeed tie in to your post.
DeleteIt's so very true that we fight against those patterns to be better than ever.
ReplyDeleteLiz @ Nut in a Nutshell: Welcome. You are right about that fight.
DeleteBrilliant!
ReplyDeleteIf I could only say: not only do i not want to be like them, I also don't want to know them.
Friko: Not knowing them (ever) would be wonderful.
DeleteOh you are most definitely not alone my friend. What a very eloquent quote that just about says it all. I think we have all had to deal with very, very difficult people in our lives. I had a friend who once said when we were discussing this particular topic, hers not mine, just thank God we don't have to live with them. I do, every day :) I fill my precious time with dear, sweet people who are actually nice to me and like being in my company, because frankly life is just to short to have to deal with the alternative. Now, my other half says that these are the people who need our help the most, but I'm afraid after suffering taunts and insults for many years, I now realized I had to take care of my own well-being to be able to take care of others. A little wordier than usual but there you go, I think you touched on a subject that I have thought about a lot lately.
ReplyDeleteDenise: This obviously resonates as strongly with you as it did with me. And yes, I agree that life is far too short ...
DeleteYou are a very wise woman.
ReplyDeleteI love this quote & i adore you. Xxxx
My Inner Chick: Not wise, glad that you love the quote, and thank you.
Deleteglad we have found
ReplyDeleteand support each other, friend!
Cloudia: Me too. Thank you.
DeleteIt's family (mostly) that come to mind for me when I see this photo, too. It uplifts me to know that while I'll make my own new mistakes, there are certain ones that will never, never have a place in my life save in my memory.
ReplyDeleteDeb: Oh yes. It is mostly (but not exclusively) family for me too. And, dammit, I will make my own mistakes.
DeleteLove this!
ReplyDeleteCrack You Whip: Thank you.
DeleteThanks for stopping by,EC. I hope you enjoyed my paradise found.. :)
ReplyDeleteI wish you and SP peace and contentment.
Pam: I did enjoy your little slice of paradise. Thank you.
DeleteHey there....you have won the cookbook from thefeatherednest with your guess of "somethng eXotic eXtreme and eXcellent. That was the closest anyone came I think. Send me your mailing address to ournest@live.ca and I will pop it in the post on Monday morning.
ReplyDeletemybabyjohn/Delores: Thank you. I will contact you in a little while.
DeleteMan, did you ever hit the nail on the head with this one! Relatives Grrrrrr.
ReplyDeleteHey, I can't get here just by clicking on your name in my blog comments,like before. I had to click on your Gravatar pic, go to your Gravatar profile, then click on your blog link from there. Anyways, I got here. A little worse for wear, but here I is.
spectrumwoman: Relatives can be very special indeed - in both interpretations of the word.
DeleteI know you can't just click on my name and waltz over. WordPress decided that since my Gravatar came through them I could only comment at WordPress blogs through my gravatar and could no longer link directly back to a Blogger post. Truly infuriating. I am glad that you fought through the extra layers. You are always welcome.
So so true unfortantely. But I feel lucky to know you. Thank you for your well wishes. I enjoy your comment's.
ReplyDeleteLove,debbie:)
BeautifulDees: Thank you - on all counts.
DeleteWell, clearly a world of people agree with you. I am not that kind, I'm afraid, though I do wish I felt that way. I have tried that approach but anyone who knows me would see that it has never sunk to my core. I'm not all that grateful.
ReplyDeleteIt is a fine way to deal with assh&*es, however.
I am more grateful to the kind ones, the brilliant ones, the silly ones, who remind me of who I would like to BE.
Speaking of such people, I am grateful for you. So there. Thank you for more than you know.
JeanetteLS: Thankyou. It has indeed served as an education to me finding out quite a number of people I never, ever want to become.
DeleteQuery? Am I kind, brilliant or silly? (no need to answer that)
It's like "weeding the garden". Got to do it so there's more room for the plants you want to grow.
ReplyDeletePeople can be weeds. Some are tolerable dandelions, though. =)
Have Myelin: Weeding the garden is a really good analogy. Thank you.
DeleteHoly Dooly!! Is it not amazing that so many of us find that this little quote/ string of words touches something within..I am so glad you shared this - I have really enjoyed reading all your comments...XX Melissa
ReplyDeleteOne Too Many: Thank you so much for allowing me to borrow/steal this gem. As you can see, it hit a nerve with many, many people. Thanks again.
Delete