Wednesday, 13 February 2013

He is home.

Drat it.

Many years ago I went (once) to see an arrogant toad with an M.D after his name.  He asked 'what seems to be the problem'.  'I have a throat infection' I replied.  Toad's response 'And when did you complete your medical training'.  There are no prizes for guessing what was wrong with me.

I still haven't completed (or started) medical training.  However, I do know the smaller portion well and, over the years have experienced far too many medical dramas with him. 

He has been discharged too early (with horrendous consequences) before.  Yesterday was the first day since his operation when he had been allowed a 'normal' diet.  At lunchtime the first such meal arrived - just as he was whisked off to have an ultrasound.  When he returned his lunch was gone.  He was also still receiving, and dependent on oxygen.  We took him to the cafeteria for a cup of coffee and he was an attractive grey shade and gasping when we returned him to the ward half an hour later.  Hospital staff had flagged his imminent discharge and he said 'I really don't think I am ready'.  Coming from his lips this is a HUGE admission.

This morning at 7.30 he rang me to say that his doctor was very pleased, and that he was being sent home today.  WTF?  And sent home he was.

A community nurse will come and change his dressing on Friday, and on Monday another will remove the multiplicity of staples currently holding him together.

'Make an appointment to see your surgeon in four to six weeks time'.  'You may drive when you can complete normal (but unspecified) chores in say, two weeks time'.

Waiting for the discharge papers to be completed and to collect his medication exhausted him.  He couldn't face anything to eat (and food has a number of issues for him) and fell into bed when we got home three hours ago.  He is still out like a light.

I so hope that this isn't another premature discharge.  Hope it, but am not convinced.  Cross your fingers and toes that his vile convalescence is the worst I have to deal with in the coming days and weeks.

PS:  In their efficiency the hospital has just rung me to ask 'when he left the discharge lounge, and whether he had his medication?'  Superlative record keeping.  Not.
at

84 comments:

  1. Karen13 February 2013 at 15:58

    OMG...I'll pray for you all, and I am not that religious. But I think you will need all the help you can get!! Your free health care system sounds so much like our free health care system. My FIL (90 years old) is being released from hospital tomorrow, ( a big surprise for us, and we have been told he cannot live on his own at home. We do not have a retirement facility lined up for him, but they don't care!

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    1. Elephant's Child14 February 2013 at 16:21

      Karen: I hope you find somewhere for your FIL to live and be cared for. Soon.

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  2. dinahmow13 February 2013 at 16:07

    ^^*!!329u4@^$^&*(****! Merchant bankers!

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    1. Elephant's Child14 February 2013 at 16:22

      dinahmow: I must be tired. I was wondering what bankers had to do with it...

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  3. molly13 February 2013 at 16:47

    As you so succinctly say "Hiss and spit and WTF!" Fingers crossed for you and him...

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    1. Elephant's Child14 February 2013 at 16:24

      Molly: At least I no longer have to deal with hospital staff - and in particular doctors.

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  4. Lee13 February 2013 at 17:46

    Oh! My goodness! This all is so unbelievable! Where is this hospital? Who are these people? It's like something out of "American Horror Story"!

    My best thoughts are with you and "He"!

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    1. Elephant's Child14 February 2013 at 16:25

      Lee: I think a lot of the problem is caused by the concept that medical care should be 'cost neutral'.

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  5. Alexia13 February 2013 at 20:03

    Good heavens. Unbelievable. I have everything crossed for you, EC (which may present a few problems in the morning when it comes to having a shower and heading off to school...)

    I am truly shocked at what I have learnt from your posts about the Australian hospital system - or maybe it's just your state. Either way, I wouldn't care to be a patient there!

    My heartfelt good wishes for you all over the next few weeks. If you have the time and the energy, I hope you can tell us how things are going.

    Arohanui

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    1. Elephant's Child14 February 2013 at 16:26

      Alexia: Thank you. I hope you were able to shower and head off to work with no mishaps.

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  6. Unknown13 February 2013 at 20:05

    Best wishes to you both. You are in my prayers. I know that here people are discharged because of insurance. Insurance can deem how long you are in the hospital! GEEZE! You know EVERYONE heals at the same rate. But your hospital seems to take the cake for incompetence!

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    1. Elephant's Child14 February 2013 at 16:26

      Teresa: I am still hoping that the surgery at least went well.

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  7. MedicatedMoo13 February 2013 at 20:34

    Awful! I was shaking my head in dismay whilst reading this - don't they care about patients at all?

    Fingers crossed that he recuperates well and quickly (and better!) at home with you.

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    1. Elephant's Child14 February 2013 at 16:28

      Kath Lockett: As I said to Lee, I blame the push for health care which costs the government as little as possible...

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  8. River13 February 2013 at 21:20

    I'm surprised too, that he is home so soon. Didn't the hospital learn anything from the last time? He should be in there at least ten days or two weeks and not sent home unless fully stabilised.

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    1. Elephant's Child14 February 2013 at 16:29

      River: I am not even certain that they read the notes from his previous admission.

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  9. Lynn13 February 2013 at 21:29

    I wish I could say I am surprised by this news, but it seems par for the course these days. I hope the recuperation goes as well as it can and that his sister stays on for a bit to help. Take care of yourself, too. xo

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  10. Ann ODyne13 February 2013 at 21:43

    what on earth did the quack WANT you to say in reply to "what seems to be the problem?". can you change to a doctor who realises that everyone who comes through his door feels bad already, and so does not need smart-mouth from someone who has pledged to 'first do no harm'. jeez.
    Wishing you smooth sailing through the coming days.
    X X

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    1. Elephant's Child14 February 2013 at 16:30

      Ann O'Dyne: I only saw that particular toad once. Arrogant pratt.

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  11. Vicki13 February 2013 at 22:09

    WTF indeed. What a hideous predicament.

    Doesn't sound like he is ready to come home. I think they wanted his bed for the next poor soul and couldn't pack him off quick enough.
    I hope he will get stronger by the day at home under your care and may there be no set backs.
    Wishing you both all the best in the coming weeks.

    On doctors, well, don't get me started! It's why I try all natural remedies at home first with mostly great success. Then, when I need further help, I see a naturopath. As a very last resort, I'll see a doctor - and that's mostly for their diagnostic equipment.
    I've had too many bad experiences with the medical profession when my mother was alive. I have little regard.
    It certainly hasn't gotten any better.
    They are 'tools' to be used at last resort as far as I'm concerned.

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    1. Elephant's Child14 February 2013 at 16:31

      Vicki: We also try and stay away from doctors where-ever possible. However, surgery needs them. Damn it.

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  12. Anonymous13 February 2013 at 22:57

    Well...he may be better off at home. At least you have a clue in how to look after him. Good luck. I'll be thinking about you.

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  13. Mimsie13 February 2013 at 23:28

    This is so ridiculous and I feel for you both. I think perhaps a full time nurse would he the way to go but I guess that is beyond the possible.
    I too pray (and as you know I am not religious) that all will be OK with both of you.
    I would be writing to the Federal Minister for Health and perhaps the Minister for Aging (not sure how old you have to be to be considered aging). They are pretty useless but your complaint should definitely go the top.
    Thinking of you with sincere positive thoughts. xx

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    1. Elephant's Child14 February 2013 at 16:32

      Mimsie: I think I am the full time nurse. Cheap too.

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  14. Ron Dudley13 February 2013 at 23:56

    Fingers, toes and all other extremities available are crossed for you. The best of luck!

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  15. DJan14 February 2013 at 00:43

    I only hope that you will be able to cope with the difficulties he is sure to face, because being out of that hospital seems a plus to me. His colon has been reattached, he can do nothing but rest and recuperate, and he has you (and his sister?) to care for him. I'm hoping it will turn out all right. Scary hospital, scary doctors!!!

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    1. Elephant's Child14 February 2013 at 16:33

      DJan: I will manage. I would rather not - but I will.

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  16. Laura Eno14 February 2013 at 01:05

    Ugh! And the horrors continue... It's the same way in the U.S. People get tossed out of the hospital way before they are ready. Hopefully, all you'll have to deal with is grumbling. I'm sure SP will be more comfortable at home than he was there. Will be sending healing thoughts and warm wishes your way. Hugs to all of you!

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    1. Elephant's Child14 February 2013 at 16:34

      Laura Eno: The only consolation is the whole debacle is that we won't receive bills for it.

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  17. Joanne Noragon14 February 2013 at 01:13

    Unbelievable. Best wishes with the crossed fingers and toes.

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  18. Andrea @ From The Sol14 February 2013 at 01:40

    And what about the 0xygen? Is he okay without it? Did they even attempt to wean him? Oh, my dear, my heart goes out to you and to SP. I hope Sil is still there to help. It is going to be a slow recovery and "drive in two weeks" ... are they kidding? I love that you are using your sense of humor (Penguin & Leopard) to keep your spirits up ... humor is the greatest elixir. Not that you have a choice, but hang tough EC, this too shall pass.

    Andrea @ From The Sol

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    1. Elephant's Child14 February 2013 at 16:36

      Andrea: I could as soon do without my sense of humour as I could without my skeleton or skin. He does seem a little better today. After a night of him thrashing around and rolling himself in the bed clothes I could do with twenty-four hours sleep. At least.

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  19. Riot Kitty14 February 2013 at 02:09

    I hope he stays well! I'm just in awe every time I see info. about your hospital here. Fingers crossed for you both.

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    1. Elephant's Child14 February 2013 at 16:37

      Riot Kitty: And yet, I still think that our medical system has some huge pluses.

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  20. jenny_o14 February 2013 at 04:05

    Wow! They couldn't get him out the door fast enough ... hope he gets lots of rest at home, and keeps to a diet that will travel quietly and considerately through his tender innards.

    And I hope you can breathe in, breathe out, relax and get some rest too.

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    1. Elephant's Child14 February 2013 at 16:38

      jenny_o: Feeding him is going to be a challenge. Sigh.

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  21. Susan Kane14 February 2013 at 04:57

    Nothing like a speedy discharge (don't let the door hit you as you leave) to leave one feeling like your life doesn't mean diddly-squat in the medical world.

    Maybe being out of the hospital routine will let him rest? Praying for you all.

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    1. Elephant's Child14 February 2013 at 16:39

      Susan Kane: Thank you. And yes, as an individual he didn't seem to matter a lot - and me less. Hiss and

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  22. Anonymous14 February 2013 at 08:31

    All limbs duly crossed. Thinking of you and the patient.

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  23. Sherri14 February 2013 at 13:40

    Oh goodness.... keeping you in my thoughts & prayers, hoping for an easy recovery!

    This is one of the small reasons I am dreading our new healthcare reformed system. So dreading it...

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    1. Elephant's Child14 February 2013 at 16:40

      Sherri: Thank you. Our problems do not relate to our system of universal health care - or at least I don't believe so.

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  24. Paper Chipmunk (aka Ellen)14 February 2013 at 18:49

    UGH!! As some other Americans here have noted, it's just as bad in the US. I once went to sit with a friend who'd had a hernia operation. She was in the recovery room, obviously having a bad time coming out of the anesthesia. She'd just had the freaking surgery. And they kept trying to force her out of bed so she could be discharged. They practically dragged her out of the bed, whereupon she collapsed and passed out on the floor. As they were bringing her round, still on the floor and more grey than ash, they turned to me and said they were going to put her in my car so I could take her home. Right then. She was still on the floor. In the Recovery Room. She lived alone, had nobody at home to help her, and I could not stay with her. I refused to take her. They got testy. She was on the government poverty medical program and they weren't getting paid as much as they'd like for her. Sure does make one feel like an expendable piece of trash.

    I wish I could be shocked at what they've done to him (and, by extension, you), but unfortunately...

    I hope with all my heart he will eat and keep it down and not wind up back in that hell hole, although, obviously, that's really where he should still be. I can't think of obscenities appropriately obscene enough for the situation they've put you in.

    As for the patronizing doctor... God, I hate them. Hate. Hate. Hate.

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    1. Elephant's Child15 February 2013 at 08:27

      Paper Chipmunk (aka Ellen): I am not a fan of medicos myself. Some of them are wonderful. Many are, to put it politely, not.

      He is eating miniscule amounts. His nights (and therefore mine) are vile as he tosses and turns, moans and groans. Sigh.

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  25. Ms. CrankyPants15 February 2013 at 00:06

    Like Karen, I'm not especially religious, but I will send my version of a prayer to you both. WTF sounds just about right.

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    1. Elephant's Child15 February 2013 at 08:29

      Ms. CrankyPants: I may have to borrow your name. My mantra of the day is not really repeatable in family situations at the moment. So I mutter. A long ago cat expressed it beautifully for me mung, mung, mung .

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  26. Cuby15 February 2013 at 03:40

    I hope his recovery is steady and upward without set backs, always a worrying and stressful time. Thoughts of you both from far away here in England.

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    1. Elephant's Child15 February 2013 at 08:29

      the cuby poet: Thank you. Good wishes are always welcome from near and far.

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  27. Carol15 February 2013 at 08:01

    Best of luck, EC, it certainly has been gruelling for you both. I hope all goes well and that you manage some well earned rest now and then. Fingers crossed.

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    1. Elephant's Child15 February 2013 at 08:30

      Carol: Rest? Cue hysterical laughter. In my next life. (Can you tell I had yet another bad night, after a gruelling day?)

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  28. All Consuming15 February 2013 at 10:40

    All is crossed and double crossed hon. Hey, maybe this time they got it right (ducks out of the way of the swinging fist). I really do hope so though. Hugs atcha X

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    1. Elephant's Child15 February 2013 at 13:01

      All Consuming: Perhaps you are right. I really, really hope you are right.

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  29. Christine15 February 2013 at 21:57

    It is cruel what they do at hospitals these days. I had a recent stint in hospital - onlu one or two days, but the horrors beyond that were dreadful. My GP remarked that the hospitals leave it to them to clear up the mess...Hiss, spit and anger++++

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    1. Elephant's Child16 February 2013 at 07:23

      Christine: Naive me is very sad that it has come to this. Just the same, hiss, spit and anger are the things that they make me feel. (Not to mention fatigue and fear.)

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  30. Birdie15 February 2013 at 23:34

    What is it about hospitals? I work in the field and see people being discharged well before they should be. Are you able to request Home Support?

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    1. Elephant's Child16 February 2013 at 07:23

      Birdie: The Community Nurse will come by on Monday to remove the his staples and we will see how we go from there.

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  31. Carol Kilgore16 February 2013 at 09:08

    I hope he is still home and eating by now. Much luck!

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    1. Elephant's Child16 February 2013 at 10:00

      Carol Kilgore: Thank you. Still home, eating a little, sleeping very, very badly. Could be better, could be a LOT worse.

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  32. My Inner Chick17 February 2013 at 06:41

    Hisssssssssss. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

    Loving you from afar.
    saying a prayer for from afar.

    Xxxxx

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  33. Dee17 February 2013 at 10:44

    Dear EC, this calls for more hissing and spitting and a lot of finger, toes, arms, legs, and even bosom crossing! You must be nearly at your wit's end. I'm sending all the healing white light I can imagine. Peace and please be gracious to yourself in the midst of all this confusion and concern.

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    1. Elephant's Child17 February 2013 at 12:03

      Dee: Healing white light thoughts are much appreciated. I know it is wrong, but for the moment I have largely put myself to the back of the queue.

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  34. Austan17 February 2013 at 14:09

    EC- All will be well, and all manner of things will be well. Much love, patience and deep breaths to you. xo Laura

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    1. Elephant's Child17 February 2013 at 16:29

      Austan: Thank you. Breathing deeply. Very deeply.

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  35. Laloofah18 February 2013 at 01:45

    I love Laura's reply above. A lovely reminder that even calmed me, and I wasn't feeling agitated! :-)

    I hope things are going better than you anticipated and that the SP is on the mend. I don't like it either when patients are discharged prematurely (it's all about the money, not the well-being!), but think that home is usually the more healing environment, and usually safer, too, given the high rate of infections found in hospitals!

    When I was six or seven, I had to have a double hernia operation at the Philadelphia Naval Hospital. My first day there, my doctor referred to me as "Gloria." When the hospital called my father to tell him I was being discharged, the nurse said - and I quote - "Your son Lloyd is ready for pick-up." My father said, "I'm thrilled for Lloyd, but my daughter's is Laurie!" After that, my father would often combine the hospital's two blunders and call me "Gloyd." :-) Less amusing was the fact another child on my under-supervised pediatric ward dug through the trash at the nurse's station and got a used hypodermic needle, which he managed to jab me in the foot with. Since there was a girl on our ward with tetanus, this caused quite the uproar (my parents doing most of the roaring). Guess some things never change. As I said, many are the reasons to be glad the SP is back home! Wishing all there wellness, healing and peace of mind...

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    1. Elephant's Child18 February 2013 at 03:24

      Laloofah: It seems that hospitals and doctors have a lot in common across the world.
      In some ways he is indeed better at home. However he is still not eating well and is having HUGE difficulties sleeping. Which means I am. This too will pass.

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  36. klahanie18 February 2013 at 13:01

    After such a catalogue of miscommunication and a litany of errors at the hospital, let's hope that you can now both look forward to some positive outcome.

    As you know, my experiences with the NHS have been top rate. And when they found out about my one concern with the vagueness of appointment letters, they contacted me, thanked me at the hospital and the situation has been quickly resolved.

    I'm pretty lucky. I wish you both well.

    In peace and hope, your friend,

    Gary

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    1. Elephant's Child18 February 2013 at 17:22

      klahanie: Thank you. Things are slowly (mostly) starting to improve. It is still a bit one step forward and one back, but hopefully that will change soon. I am very glad that your experiences with the NHS were positive.

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  37. unikorna18 February 2013 at 23:04

    I am sure the hard aprt is passed and you'll both soon find some peace. Hospitals are so exhausting. You have so much light and love in you, I am sure you'll help him reach healing soon.

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    1. Elephant's Child20 February 2013 at 17:06

      unikorna: Thank you. That is a truly lovely thing to say.

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  38. daisyfae21 February 2013 at 08:21

    Every possible appendage that can be crossed is crossed... hoping for the best, but like you, would be fully prepared for... the repeat performance.

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    1. Elephant's Child21 February 2013 at 17:35

      daisyfae: Very, very small steps in the right direction are being made. Yay. And similar celebratory terms.

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  39. Oregon Gifts of Comfort and Joy23 February 2013 at 05:31

    Hi. That is scary, and I hope that he will heal right up and regain his strength quickly. We had a similar thing happen with my MIL ... 1 week in the hospital, 4 weeks in the nursing home (discharged without oxygen for some reason), one day home, 10 days in the hospital and then back home and doing great now. It was the nursing home that I had my doubts about, and I made my own medical history notebook for her which helped a lot when she had to be readmitted to the hospital. Best of luck, and thanks so much for your comment on Becky's blog.

    Kathy M.

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    1. Elephant's Child23 February 2013 at 11:42

      Oregon Gifts of Comfort and Joy: Welcome and thank you. Sadly it seems that medical care the world over suffers from very similar problems. The skinny one is making slow progress - which is a decided improvement on his last hospital stay.

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  40. Arija3 March 2013 at 11:53

    Reading this just makes me livid! Our hospitals are completely our of control. The state governments spend billions on useless stadiums and race events for the masses and keep cutting hospital beds. My husband spent a night on a barouche at the Royal Adelaide Hosp. with pneumonia. He was given a shot of antibiotics and turfed out at 7am in the middle of the city, without a phone, money and with insufficient clothing. A man of 75 with a fading memory. We live in the country but, even if he had had the fare, he could not have got home by bus. I have heard recently of another such case.
    I do hope your Skinny Portion regains his health. The one thing I can suggest, is to have a recommendation to a good physician who recommends operations and surgeons and looks after the patient's total wellbeing and would not let someone in such a delicate state be discharged.
    I have kept both of you in my prayers every day

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    1. Elephant's Child3 March 2013 at 11:58

      Arija: Thank you. I am really, really sorry (and unsurprised) to hear that vile treatment and too early discharge seems to be the norm. He is slowly, very slowly getting better. A shower still exhausts him and leaves him breathless. Everything exhausts him. And in three months time (or so) we will join the merrygoround again.

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  41. Arija3 March 2013 at 18:28

    Poor man, he does not even get the time to recover from the anaesthetic in so short a time.
    I keep you securely locked in healing thoughts.

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  42. Pia K7 March 2013 at 11:21

    sounds absolutely dreadful, i wonder exactly when the medical system went from decent to this, seems like it's more or less the same all over the world. i hope he is doing better each and every day.

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    1. Elephant's Child7 March 2013 at 16:06

      Pia K: It was/is dreadful. He is doing better - but is due to have more surgery in a few months, which has me worried.

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