Tuesday, 3 December 2013

Surgeon's Playground

We went to see the smaller portion's surgeon on Friday.  After examining the skinny one he commented that his belly was 'a surgeon's playground'.  True - and I wish someone had told them to play nicely.

After six abdominal surgeries it is strongly reminiscent of Frankenstein's Monster.  And there will be another operation in the New Year.  Hopefully the last but no guarantees.  Sigh.

The smaller portion drove off to visit a friend a little while ago.  The friend lives more than 600 kilometres away so he will be gone for a couple of days.  Is he well enough?  I don't know, but he is an adult and it isn't my decision.

And I am going to revel in being home alone.  I am tired to the bone and beyond, my pain levels are high and bits of me are non-functional.  There is cleaning, weeding, shopping and baking to do - and they aren't going to happen.  And will still be there when I surface again.  

I have a commitment to Lifeline and another to the Multiple Sclerosis Peer Support Program which I will honour - and everything else can go hang.

Give us this day our daily whinge.

131 comments:

  1. Oh my, dear lady, you've got to take care of YOU. It seems you are going to take some much needed time out and do exactly that. Good for YOU.

    Gary

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    1. klahanie: Dear Gary, thank you. A brief interlude of very little. Which sounds like bliss.

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  2. Take advantage and do have a good rest and pamper yourself, cool drinks and long baths and lots of daydreaming I hope.

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  3. Self-care is extremely important - all of that stuff will just have to wait. Sending you good thoughts and I hope you feel better soon!

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  4. Take care of yourself!! You're always welcome to join me in a glass of whine.

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    1. fishducky: A bottle of whine sounds good. A large bottle.

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  5. Whinge away! It's good for all manner of things (as long as it's not habitual!) And don't stray too far from this toy...I might need to have a garden whinge!

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    1. dinahmow: I hope you don't need a garden whinge. Your work in the garden is inspirational.

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  6. I absolutely agree. Everything can wait, but taking care of yourself can't.

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    1. Starting Over, Accepting Changes - Maybe: It will have to wait - even if it thinks it can't.

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  7. As some already said here, take care of yourself! Who cares about cleaning and weeding etc.? If you don't do it today you can be sure it's still there tomorrow - these things have an annoying tendency to stick around.

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    1. Carola Bartz: Oh yes, it will still be here. And I will get to it - eventually.

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  8. I am a firm believer in sleep. A toasty warm bed in winter; a cool one in summer. Since it's spring in OZ, I guess you'll need to decide. Just make it a good sleep! A couple nights' worth.

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    1. Joanne Noragon: I retired back to bed for a nap after himself left. It was short - but blissful. And I may have another before I go on call later this evening.

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  9. EC, look after yourself and do what you can. Enjoy the space!

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    1. Carol in Cairns: Thank you. I do like my down time.

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  10. After reading your last letter and thinking "tsk tsk" regarding your significant other having a hernia, my doc called and - guess what - I have one too. tsk tsk Someone must have prayed for me. Next it will be shingles. lol

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    1. lotta joy: Snow's revelation's about prayer obviously stuck in someone else's head. I do hope that you don't add shingles to the mix - and am sorry that you too have acquired a hernia. Good luck.

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    2. I wonder if I too have a hernia, rather than hip area tendonitis. I like the idea of a hernia more, for some reason. Maybe its because I don't like these opposing muscle exercises I'm to be doing and my cats keep running off with and puncturing my exercise stretchie rubbers.

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    3. Strayer: Himself's hernia is pretty obvious - when he leans forward his intestines bulge his belly. Probably a lot less painful than your tendonitis - but with no cure except surgery.

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  11. Take care of yourself, sleep lots!

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  12. Ohhh I love being home alone. Enjoy your time by yourself, EC - you have, and have had, so much to contend with in the time I have been visiting your blog that I can well imagine that you are running on empty.
    Indulge yourself. Read, sleep, gaze at your beautiful garden... no weeding, though! Those chores will be there waiting when normal routine resumes.

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    1. Alexia: Home alone is bliss. And I am indeed running on empty. I hope he enjoys his time away - because I will.

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  13. Spoil yourself in this quiet time. You deserve it. Much.

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  14. I hope you are able to give yourself a bit of pampering in that alone time without the SP. I know there's lots to do, but none of it is as important as reveling in knowing there is nobody but you to care for. Hugs and my glass is raised to YOU. :-)

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    1. DJan: I am very happy to share your deserved glass.

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    1. jenny_o: I intend to. Carry on doing as little as possible.

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  16. Wishing you both well - and I hope you get the rest you deserve.

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    1. ladyfi: I don't know about deserve - but certainly want and need. And my nap was WONDERFUL.

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  17. Put your feet up and have a good rest.
    Merle..........

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    1. Merlesworld: I am. When the cats will alllow it.

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  18. Don't worry about the chores; I hereby give you permission to have a good rest. And don' worry about The Smaller Portion, I'm sure a holiday will be good for him too. Best wishes.

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    1. lynners: You are very right. A holiday is what we both need.

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  19. sounds to me like you have learned the very healthy art of stopping! go you!

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    1. kylie: I have largely stopped - and am very happy to do so.

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  20. ....And all this we pray, amen!

    Hope you feel stronger/better sooner than later and house chores never end, do they, so I stopped stressing about doing them "on time."

    Take care and best wishes to the smaller portion on his travels there and back :)

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    1. Mark Koopmans: Thank you. He rang a couple of hours ago to say he had arrived (which I appreciated). And how right you are about the never-endingness of domestic duties.

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  21. Over there they would say "I'll put the kettle on". That's exactly what I'll do, I'll put the kettle on for you.

    Greetings from London.

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    1. A Cuban in London: Thank you - and please, stay and have a cuppa with me.

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  22. I wish for you that you were feeling better for this wonderful time alone, but glad for you that you have this time alone. I imagine there will be lots of reading?

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    1. Lynn: How well you know me. I have finished one book (pleasant trash) today and started another...

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  23. If the smaller portion is driving 600 km, I'd say he's feeling pretty good, he wouldn't attempt it otherwise. Would he?
    Nevertheless, you now have two days in which to get plenty of rest and sleep. In between Lifeline and MS Peer support of course. Take a break from us and put your feet up. We'll be here when you are back.

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    1. River: His ill health has been frustrating him, and he is not always sensible. I think he is ok. I hope so anyway. And it will do us both good.
      Lifeline until a little after midnight tonight, then a sleep in, then peer support.

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  24. Enjoy your days of alone time. I just had a few of my own--they come once a year, before Thanksgiving--and they keep me going until the next. The hell with the every day, just take care of you. I hope your pain lessens, and you sleep deep, and when the SP returns, you will find renewed strength and energy. Peace...

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    1. Linda: Not a lot of sleep last night but, when I have met my commitment for the day a nap is on the agenda. A big one.

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  25. a surgeon's playground - the exact words said to me too. I wish they'd tire of their games for all of us. Chill, chill, chill now....revel in doing absolutely nothing apart from that which takes your whim whenever you can. A good rest on your own will be well times and necessary methinks. Hugs x

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    1. All Consuming: I wonder whether that (I think) offensive phrase is in their handbook. Probably.
      Resting is good.

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  26. Good, take some time for yourself!

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  27. Nothing better than a good pity party! I say wallow in it:) Sometimes it is something we must do in order to survive.

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  28. Indeed, take care of YOU and please get lots of R&R! Simplify, simplify! And as you wrote above: "...and everything else can go hang." I agree! :)

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  29. Hang in there. You are loved by many you don't even know.

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    1. Abraham Lincoln: Thank you so much. The warmth I have found in the blogosphere blows me away.

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  30. A few days with no one to look after but you. It should be very healing. Just relax and luxuriate. You deserve it.

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    1. Delores: Don't forget Jazz n Jewel. But yes, I am thinking of it as a healing interlude.

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  31. You need this time to rest and nourish your tired bones!!! You deserve to. I hope you feel better and back up and running 110%. Thinking of you ~

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    1. Deb: Thank you. I would settle for firing at much less than 110%, but it is definitely something to aspire to.

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    2. Sending positive energy your way. Hoping today is a much better day.

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  32. Read. Relax. Meditate.

    wish I could bring you over some Christmas Cookies!

    Hugging you from Minnesota. XxOO

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    1. My Inner Chick: Hugs gratefully received - and returned.

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  33. Yes, it can all go hang. Hiss and spit on the more surgery part. I hope it's really the last one!
    Hugs in abundance to you.

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    1. River Fairchild: Hiss and spit indeed. I/we also hope that there is no more abdominal surgery ahead (or really any surgery). Time will tell.

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  34. If we were neighbours I'd pop over the fence and pull a few weeks and do the dusting. The baking, however, would be your problem - not one of my strong points by any stretch of the imagination ...

    Hope the Skinny One returns safe and sound. Take care xo

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    1. Wendy: Thank you. Though the ambience of this house is dusty. And the weeds are legion. I have made seven Christmas cakes and the fruit is at least soaking for the next batch.

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    2. Seven Christmas cakes? Dear god!

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    3. Wendy: A tradition which has become a very large rod for my back. For twenty years or so we have been giving them as gifts. It has got bigger than Ben Hur - and people have chucked tanties when I have suggested whittling it back. I am going to have to stand firm soon though. I think there are about fifteen on the list this year - of varying sizes.

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  35. I think you are entitled to a whinge and a bit of 'me' downtime :)

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    1. DeniseinVA: Commitments out the way, I am going back to bed for a bit.

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  36. Enjoy the solitude. Rest, rest, rest.

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  37. Two more surgeries and the smaller portion ought to get a coupon for a freebie. I've been helping a girl who's been carved up too often this year, as well. Strength to you both, and for now, a coupon for a free whinge.

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    1. John Wiswell: Now that is a coupon I will gladly pass on. Thank you - I know you face far too many health issues of your own, and am not surprised to hear that you are there for others.

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  38. Whinge away--you've earned it! I hope the next surgery is the last. Regain your strength for the battles ahead. Until then, let everything else hang:) Except wine!

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    1. writerlysam: Welcome - and thank you. Wine is always welcome.

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  39. Absolutely whinge away! And it's not really whining - I think everyone is entitled to vent their feelings and I can quite understand that this has been a trying time. I hope your other half gets home safely and that you get a few days of uninterrupted cat therapy :-)

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    1. Marie: Trying indeed. And the rest and the cat therapy has been good. I might even do some productive things today.

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  40. Enjoy the quiet and get some rest. You need it!

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    1. Susan Kane: He is (probably) coming home today so perhaps some cleaning is in order. It was a lovely respite period though.

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  41. Your still able to make me laugh out loud .. sorry but I love your sense of humor EC. Enjoy your aloneness :)

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    1. Pam:): Thank you - not everyone does laugh at the things which amuse me. Not by a long shot.

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  42. Eureka! So glad that worked and now I can go ahead and let everyone else know. Thanks so much for doing this. Ever so grateful! Hugs, Denise :)

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    1. DeniseinVA: Thank you - it was an irritation which I am glad to have removed. Not the links, but where they came from and how to remove them.

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  43. That's not whining. That's facts.

    I feel for you, my friend. And I admire you honoring your obligations.

    Hope you enjoy the alone time.

    Pearl

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    1. Pearl: I have been loving the alone time - he is due home sometime today. And obligations are just that - I need to honour them. For me as much as for them.

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  44. I hope you resurface soon and that the smaller portion has no more surgeries. That's a lot to take on all at once.

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    1. M Pax: It has been a 'challenging' couple of years. The end is in sight (I think) but it has escaped us before. A sense of humour and the magic in the blogosphere have been a huge help.

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  45. Amen to that! We all need a daily whinge :)

    If your SP is anything like my hubby, then he needs the drive to think things out. Men (not to generalise too much) seem to enjoy getting out for a long drive - or motorbike ride, in my hubby's case - to sort out stuff in their head.
    Hubby (almost) always comes back in a better mood with things in order mentally.

    A rather long way of saying, it's a male thing.

    Hope you enjoy your "me time". I know I enjoy mine ;)

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    1. Vicki: Oh yes. And motorcycle too - though he is too uncomfortable to ride at the moment. And yes, the time alone has been wonderful. I seem to need rather a lot of it - more than I usually get.

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  46. And let everything else go to "hang"...and don't feel guilty about it. Take time out for yourself...do nothing and enjoy doing nothing! That's an order! ;)

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    1. Lee: I am starting to surface again, and have improved the shining hour by doing some of the vacuuming. And it has been a delightful interlude. Not long enough, but good.

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  47. Everyone recharges in their own way, but we all need recharging from time to time. Sometimes R&R has to be a willful decision. Many have reminded me of that here lately. Sending hugs your way now. One can never have too many.

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    1. Jeff Hargett: Thank you - and how right you are about the hugs. Hugs to you too.

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  48. I'll also be alone for a while, so we could keep each other company...virtually :). I hope you're feeling a bit better, I'll send you my best energy. Kisses lovely :).

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    1. petronela: Thank you for your energy. I hope you find some joy in your time alone too.

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  49. Oh wow. that sounds serious. It is no fun having to stay home alone when you are sick. I wish you well.

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    1. Lady Lilith BloodCrave: No, not serious - just MS rearing its ugly head again. And my time alone (he is back) was bliss.

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  50. I hope you enjoyed the time to yourself. It's always such a pleasure for me when I can get it. Sorry you're not feeling well, I hope it is manageable. Big hugs.

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    1. Dorothy Krajewski: I loved the time to myself. And yes, the body is behaving badly but it is mostly manageable.

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  51. Sometimes the best thing to do when there is too much to do? Is nothing! Been there. Let your brain and body rest a bit. It'll all be there on the other side... Sending hugs... Very good that he was able to take a solo trip! and hope you both enjoyed it!

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    1. daisyfae: Thank you. I am not sure who his solo trip was best for. It did us both lots of good.

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  52. I myself being in a lesser but still uncomfortable disorder can read and understand the symptoms of your plight. More is the pity one of your callers to this blog hasn't held her/his hand high to offer assistance.
    Please get well soon.

    Wherever there is a human being, there is an opportunity for kindness.

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    1. Vest: Thank you. However, two important things need to be said. No-one lives close enough to me to be of any practical help - and what I really wanted/needed/received was time on my own. Bliss.
      The body is still behaving badly - but it does that. I am ok - really.

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  53. Have I mentioned to you that my best pal is also living with MS? I so admire both of you for how you carry on caring for others in such significant ways. It is my joy to know both of you.


    ALOHA to YOU
    from Honolulu
    Comfort Spiral
    =^..^= <3

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    1. Cloudia: No, I don't think you have mentioned your friend before. If you have to get an incurable disease there are worse ones about. And I get a great deal more from my volunteering than I give.
      Have a great weekend.

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  54. Priorities. There are always priorities.

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    1. J Cosmo Newbery: And domestic duties are rarely first on my list.

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  55. It's so hard sometimes to LET GO of things we feel we should do (such as the weeding/baking/cleaning), but how liberating when we can. Am hoping you were able rest and recover a bit. So sorry to hear you're in pain, and living with Frankenstein's Monster, no less. No, really, of course I'm wishing you and the Smaller Portion nothing but the best.

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    1. Ms. CrankyPants: And your title has fitted me well for a little while. I did rest, and am now starting (slowly) to get back to the 'should do' list. But will put it down again first chance I get.

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  56. Let's hope the surgery in the New Year really will be the final one.
    I hope, apart from your two commitments, you tok full advantage of a couple of days to yourself and rested as much as you could.
    I sometimes think it is good for two people to have some quiet time to themselves but it's not always easy to arrange it so I feel the SP did the right thing in taking himself off for a couple of days.
    I feel for you as, although I don't have a defined illness, I do know what it is to ache and ache and ache. Makes you feel really down but you always spring back quite quickly 'cos you're made of the right stuff.

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    1. Mimsie: I agree it is good to have some quiet time. Which is part of the reason I get up earlier (much earlier) than the skinny one.
      Fingers and toes crossed that this IS the final surgery.

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  57. Dear EC, what is so wonderful about this posting of yours is the revelation that you are taking care of yourself. That the list of things to do will remain a unchecked-off list and that you will rest and do only those two volunteer gifts that you have on the calendar.

    It took me so many years to learn to listen to my body. Only Meniere's stopped me from mistreating my body for the rest of my life. Now I listen closely for the signs of headache or fatigue or simply weariness that calls for a cup of tea and a rest on the couch with a good book. Please do be good to yourself. Be gracious to yourself. Peace.

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    1. Dee: I often don't listen to my body with the attention it deserves. Until it shouts at me. It shouted, I listened and I am the better for it.

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  58. Here, let me break out my cheese. Definitely a necessity. ;)

    One day at a time, eh? Here's hoping the sky is blue, you have chocolate to munch on, and a good book to tide you through the tough times. Chin up!

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    1. Crystal Collier: Welcome. Cheese is one of my most favourite things. And yes, there was chocolate and books. Lots of both.

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  59. If a surgeon ever said that my poor hacked-up body was his playground, I'd run for the hills and never look back! That's an ungodly number of abdominal surgeries. I only had one, and still suffer from the adhesions and trigger points it caused.

    I hate to break this to you, my cheese-loving friend, but dairy and MS are a bad combo. Especially fatty cheese. I can't lie, I wish you'd go vegan - I really think you'd feel better! Sure made a huge difference for me. (And, of course, for the poor cows who suffer so for the strange acquired appetite our species developed for their secretions). You could keep the chocolate though, as long as it's the real kind - the dark kind, and the more cacao the better! :-)

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    1. Laloofah: It has been an ungodly number of operations. Hopefully we are nearly at the end of it.
      And yes, I know on the cheese front. It is, for the moment, a guilty pleasure. And veganism is coming closer all the time.

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  60. Sometimes there’s just nothing to be done. Grin and bear it is the advice I give myself.
    Do I take it? Not often.

    Give us this day our daily whinge. Lovely. Will do.

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    1. Friko: I cannot remember where I found/coined give us this day our daily whinge, but it is sometimes more than necessary.

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  61. Weeding is easily achieved by reclassifying them as wild flowers. One job done for you.

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    1. Andrew Maclaren-Scott: Thank you. I have so many wild flowers at the moment that perhaps tours could be arranged.

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