Today,
September 10th, is World Suicide Prevention Day, and the start of World
Suicide Prevention Week. I spend time in the dark places myself and
know both how fast and easy the plummet to the bottom can be and how
very hard it is to see the light at the end of the proverbial tunnel much less climb out again.
Most of you know I do voluntary work with Lifeline Australia, a telephone crisis line. Almost everyone who rings those lines with thoughts of suicide has at least a degree of ambivalence. I, and all the other volunteers, will work on that ambivalence to keep the caller safe for the moment/the day and to help them see and consider other options. Lifeline believes that suicide is often preventable and that the start of the journey to safety can be only a phone call away. It is often a long and painful journey but should never ever be one that people feel condemned to walk alone.
Here in Australia suicide is still the leading cause of death for people aged under 44. More people die from suicide each year than are killed on the roads. Sadly the numbers of people we lose to suicide are rising again. Which, given that I suspect suicide is under reported, is scary.
Not only does suicide take its toll on our young, there are other groups who are over-represented in its tragic ranks including (but not limited to) our indigenous population, the LGBTQI community, people with mental health issues, farmers, tradesmen, the unemployed, and the military. Sadly we lose many more of our military personnel (serving and veterans) to suicide than we do in the theatre of war. While we still lose more men to suicide than women, the numbers of women who die by suicide is climbing (an equality I don't want).
Our suicide rate isn't the highest in the world but the rate in Australia is above the World Health Organisation's (WHO) global average.
Most of you know I do voluntary work with Lifeline Australia, a telephone crisis line. Almost everyone who rings those lines with thoughts of suicide has at least a degree of ambivalence. I, and all the other volunteers, will work on that ambivalence to keep the caller safe for the moment/the day and to help them see and consider other options. Lifeline believes that suicide is often preventable and that the start of the journey to safety can be only a phone call away. It is often a long and painful journey but should never ever be one that people feel condemned to walk alone.
Here in Australia suicide is still the leading cause of death for people aged under 44. More people die from suicide each year than are killed on the roads. Sadly the numbers of people we lose to suicide are rising again. Which, given that I suspect suicide is under reported, is scary.
Not only does suicide take its toll on our young, there are other groups who are over-represented in its tragic ranks including (but not limited to) our indigenous population, the LGBTQI community, people with mental health issues, farmers, tradesmen, the unemployed, and the military. Sadly we lose many more of our military personnel (serving and veterans) to suicide than we do in the theatre of war. While we still lose more men to suicide than women, the numbers of women who die by suicide is climbing (an equality I don't want).
Our suicide rate isn't the highest in the world but the rate in Australia is above the World Health Organisation's (WHO) global average.
In 2011 Lifeline began national suicide prevention walks - 'Out of the Shadows and into the Light'. The walks begin before dawn and continue into the growing light. It remembers those lost and those bereaved by suicide, with an additional focus on raising awareness. The symbolism of starting the walk in the dark and progressing into the light of a new day means a lot to me. Some centres start their walk later (ten or eleven) to attract more people and publicity. I can see why, but am glad that our walks start in the dark.
I don't think that all suicide is wrong. However, it is such a final decision that I hope it is not the first option considered or tried. And, as a solution to a temporary problem, I do think it is wrong. Right or wrong it is always a tragedy. A tragedy for the person who had, or believed they had, no other options and a tragedy for those they leave behind. And the ripples from that tragedy encompass a lot of people. Research shows that each time someone suicides, there are up to 135 people affected. In addition there is strong evidence that if someone close to you dies by suicide your own chances of taking that path are dramatically increased.
I couldn't attend the first walk, but have gone on all the subsequent walks.
This
year the walk started from the National Carillon again.
This morning I headed off
again before dawn, grateful for the opportunity.The dread disease slows
me down, ensures my gait is wobbly and uneven and is painful. The
issue is much more important than I am. So I walked. Slowly just as I
do every year. Stopping to take photos.
There were brief speeches. Some of the names those lost were read out - which I find moving. Sadly the list grows each year. As I have done for a number of years, I added the name of the father of a friend of mine. His family understood why he took that step but continue to mourn and grieve for the opportunity lost to say goodbye. This ceremony means that people are no longer nameless, but identified and missed. There was also an acknowledgement that there are names we do not know, which doesn't diminish their loss.
There were brief speeches. Some of the names those lost were read out - which I find moving. Sadly the list grows each year. As I have done for a number of years, I added the name of the father of a friend of mine. His family understood why he took that step but continue to mourn and grieve for the opportunity lost to say goodbye. This ceremony means that people are no longer nameless, but identified and missed. There was also an acknowledgement that there are names we do not know, which doesn't diminish their loss.
This
morning we were again given a song. A song written by a talented
performer and tagged as a favourite by someone later died by suicide in
the studio in which it was created.
Tears were shed. Tears were shared.
Come walk with me, through the chilly dawn, into the hopeful light of a new day.
The
empty chairs from other years have been replaced with candles to
symbolise the light(s) lost. Some people carried a candle with them as
they walked.
RU OK day is also celebrated in World Suicide Prevention Week. A simple question we should be asking family, friends and colleagues every day.
Some services and links which may be useful for Australian readers include:
Lifeline 1311 14
Beyond Blue 1300 224 636
Suicide Call Back Service 1300 659 467
Bless you fot doing this, Sue. We are given this life and each of our days. They are a gift. Taking this route is a terrible mistake.
ReplyDeleteSandi: It is a cause very dear to my heart. And how I wish that life didn't feel a burden for so many people.
DeleteTalking about suicide is so important. That has been a big step forward! Great post, EC.
ReplyDeleteMarie Smith: Small steps have been made, strides are needed.
DeleteThank you for taking the time to share the journey with us and for giving so much of yourself to Lifeline. I know you and the other volunteers suffer in your efforts to reach out to those in need of a connection to life.
ReplyDeleteI completely agree with you that the impact of starting the walk in darkness lends an important perspective not found in a more convenient timeframe.
Rest up, my sister across the sea, and know that you have made a difference to many, including me.
River Fairchild
River Fairchild: Thank you. Yes I am tired, but I have been tired before for much less worthwhile reasons. Thank you - and hugs. It was (as it always is) a very moving morning.
DeleteI was just about to write you an email, EC...because I was concerned. You'd not posted as early as you usually do. And, then I discovered you'd had just put up your Sunday post.
ReplyDeleteI've said it before, and I will say it again...and again, no doubt...you are a good woman with a strong, good heart. You have my admiration, and I'm sure the admiration and gratitude of many others.
Take good care of yourself, EC...and give my cuddles to your beautiful furry mates. :)
Lee: Thank you. This post would have gone up a great deal earlier if blogger hadn't been playing games.
DeleteIn the USA the new number is 811. Easier to remember.
ReplyDeleteMike: I suspect that in your country as in ours many people have the number on speed dial.
DeleteWhoops, wrong number. It's 988. 988lifeline.org
DeleteMike: Whoops indeed. Our number is close to that of a motorist's association. I have taken calls before now from people wanting them, and I suspect the reverse is true too.
DeleteThe walk looks incredibly peaceful. I am pleased you once again were able to participate, putting aside your personal difficulties.
ReplyDeleteI can your point about the importance of the correct order for this post starting in the dark and concluding with sunshine.
Andrew: It was peaceful. Peaceful rather than sombre. I made several attempts to get the order right but failed. I might try again later.
DeleteI really admire your work with LIfeline. I imagine you have helped countless people. And you've done so for so long. I love the concept of the walk out of the dark tunnel.
ReplyDeleteStrayer: Thank you. The walk this morning was lovely. We started in the near dawn (a chilly near dawn) and walked into a bright and beautiful day.
DeleteI admire your strength in doing this. It's another reason I'm glad to be able to share stuff with you from the other side of the world.
ReplyDeleteBill: Thank you. I get a great deal from my volunteer work and hope to continue it for a long, long time.
DeleteA beautiful walk, and a profound way to start the day. My many years as a volunteer with Samaritans, the UK equivalent organisation, gave, and still give a great difference to the way I try to lead the remainder of my life.
ReplyDeleteRelatively Retiring: Snap. Lifeline gives me so much and it has definitely affected the way I try and live.
DeleteA stark image of the place where I live and some thoughts from me this week.
ReplyDeletehttps://poetryofthenetherworld.blogspot.com/2023/09/safe-harbor.html
I wish I'd gotten someone like you during the times I called the mental health lines. On one occasion, the guy actually laughed at me. On another, the guy was polite but I don't think he knew how to talk to someone feeling troubled. He basically just said "good luck to you, ma'am." Not rude, but it didn't help.
Ornery Owl of Naughty Netherworld Press and Readers Roost: Thank you. I am sorry that you didn't find someone you could talk to and with. It is sometimes luck of the draw - though laughing at the caller is wrong on so many levels. I am heading over to check out your post now.
DeleteThis is so very moving EC, symbolic in many ways. Your words and photographs gave me goosebumps and time to pause and consider those I know who have been affected by suicide and their families and friends. Thank you for being a lifeline for so many
ReplyDeleteKim: Thank you. It was a very moving (and beautiful) morning. Too many lives have been hit hard by suicide. I am so glad I went.
DeleteHi EC - thank you for reminding us of this as you do each year - I've experienced it and it's desperate ... but I feel for the youngsters who feel they can't cope. I admire you for going along in your inimitable wobbly way. While the photos are moving and reminding us of all lost souls and their families. With thoughts - the cool dawn looks inviting; So many people aren't ok - and we rarely ask, and they rarely seek help - being ok, is not necessarily ok - there's more to find out. With thoughts - Hilary
ReplyDeleteHilary Melton-Butcher: Thank you. It is indeed desperate and far too common. I do hope that slowly we are heading towards a place and time where it is fine to admit that we are not ok - and to seek help.
DeleteHugs.
Suicide is such a sad thing. Hopefully more call the hotline first and get someone compassionate like you.
ReplyDeleteThe candles were a nice touch for the walk.
Alex J. Cavanaugh: I like the candles too. And some people present clutched them tightly.
DeleteDear EC
ReplyDeleteSuch an important issue and one which doesn't get as much publicity and support as it should. Thank you for doing all you do. Having a phoneline is vital to help people who don't know where to turn.
I agree, there is no right or wrong and we should try not to judge. It is indeed a tragedy.
Best wishes and virtual hugs
Ellie
Ellie Foster: Thank you. We should indeed try not to judge - but sadly we often do. I am so glad that this issue is being spoken about more often.
DeleteHugs to you too.
My work has been spreading those very same quotes around, they are wonderful. Thank you for your captures and this peaceful walk you brought through, as well as all you share with us, and your Lifeline support is so very valuable to so many. Take good care and may you find that beast of yours and create wild and wonderful things everywhere you go. Naturally in your gardens as well!
ReplyDelete21 Wits: I am so glad that you and your workplace are also spreading this message. This is a message that can never be shared too often.
DeleteI would never have contemplated suicide when I was a young adult, but as a teenager I can remember hiding in a closet and wishing I'd die, but never even thought to kill myself then. I guess I just thought if I wished it, it might happen. Now that I am old and life is harder it's another story.
ReplyDeleteLinda Starr: Your last sentence worries me. Are you ok? Email me. Please.
DeleteThank you so much, EC, for this bittersweet post. Your efforts with the Lifeline are more than commendable.
ReplyDeleteMost of us go through our days oblivious to the utter despair of many of our fellow human beings. Thank you for helping to bring us out of the shadows.
Gini and I wish good things for you as we begin a new week.
Wally Jones: Thank you. I am proud to be one among a legion of people reaching out - around the world. I hope you and Gini have a wonderful nature packed week.
DeleteSo good of you to support such a great cause even with your own debilitating disease and it doesn't get easier. It takes special people to do this. Bravo to you to champion this cause.
ReplyDeleteThere are more suicide and euthanasia in Canada then ever before and more death by over dose also. So many desperate people are hurting and so many people affected after suicide.
Keep up the good work.
Hugs, Julia
Julia: It is almost a world wide epidemic isn't it? And a cause that is very dear to me. Thank you.
DeleteGood on you, Sue.
ReplyDeleteSean Jeating: Thank you.
DeleteBeautiful images EC.
ReplyDeleteBob Bushell: It was a sad but also very beautiful morning.
DeleteI am sitting here with tears flowing down my cheeks, thinking about those I have lost this way, and also thinking about the terrible event in Morocco. I have been shaky and unsettled and needed to take this walk with you. Thank you so much, dear friend.
ReplyDeleteDJan: Thank you. I am more than happy to share this walk with you - as you share so many with us. Hugs.
DeleteWell said. What you do, Sue, is oh so very important. My husband's grandfather committed suicide when his dad was just a young man.
ReplyDeleteHuge Hugs, Sandra sandracox.blogspot.com
Sandra Cox: So many families are scarred by suicide. I really, really hope we can reduce those numbers. And huge hugs back to you - and to your husband's family.
DeleteI'm sure it comes as no surprise that most of our suicides over here are by guns.
DeleteHope the day is treating you well.
Sandra sandracox.blogspot.com
Sandra Cox: Sadly it doesn't. I don't know what the most common method is here.
DeleteSuch an important post, and I applaud you on the voluntary work you do with Lifeline.
ReplyDeleteHere in the UK we have the Samaritans, telephone 116 123.
Our walk in the UK was called Glow Night Walk 2023.
Helpful site https://mentalhealth-uk.org/suicide/
Even though blogger messed your photograph order up I enjoyed seeing them.
Wishing you a good week ahead.
All the best Jan
Lowcarb team member ~Jan: I know of the Samaritans and follow a number of blogs whose owners do or have volunteered with them. And love that the support is world wide.
DeleteI hope that you and Eddie have a wonderful week too.
I am so thankful this service exists. Suicide has touched us all in one form or another.
ReplyDeleteI am also thankful you were able to participate. The photos are lovely in any order.
messymimi: I am very grateful that Lifeline and similar services exist too - and am privileged to be able to volunteer with them.
DeleteSuch a beautiful photowalk. Mental health awareness is crucial too.
ReplyDeleteroentare: Thank you. Mental/physical/emotional health are hugely important aren't they?
DeleteWhat a lovely and meaningful series of photos! Kudos to you for all your hard work as a volunteer, and for all your hard work in completing the walk despite your pain. Here's hoping there's some desperate person out there who will hear of the walk, identify with the symbolism, and reach out for help to walk out of the darkness.
ReplyDeleteDiane Henders: I hope so, I really hope so. And I loved that the grieving families and friends present on the walk were also supported.
DeleteI am glad you were able to walk again this year. With the loading photos problem I find it helps to select your photos, put them into a separate folder then label (rename) each photo A B C D etc, with A being the one you want first and so on. Computers love to do things alphabetically and this way the photos should load in the order you want them.
ReplyDeleteRiver: I have just rescued your comment from spam again. Thank you for your suggestion - which sounds like a pain. I am not certain it will work since the photos are in numerical order and the logical computer ignores that but I will give it a try.
DeleteSuicide is on the rise, that's for sure. Not just in Australia, either. I blame a lot of teen suicide on the internet and bullying. It's easy to call someone a bad name or defame them when "you" are sitting anonymously behind a screen. These bullies are looking for and hoping the person will take their life. Parents are often unaware of all the bullying until it's too late.
ReplyDeleteYou are performing a wonderful service and I am so honored to "know" you and your courage, even though it is more painful than anyone might possibly know. Keep up the wonderful work, dear friend.
Bleubeard and Elizabeth: Thank you. It is a privilege to join with many other people and volunteer with Lifeline. How I wish that we taught people resources to cope with online bullying and removed the idea that it is weak or shameful to ask for help. At any age.
DeleteYour out of order photos don't diminish the atmosphere they reflect. Sombre and peaceful.
ReplyDeleteThanks for all your efforts toward suicide prevention and awareness. Every bit counts
kylie: Sombre, peaceful - and beautiful too. Thank you.
DeleteThank you for sharing this. Hugs to you.
ReplyDeletee: I hope to keep sharing this for many years to come. Hugs to you too dear friend.
DeleteThe photographs being out of order is trivial, Sue. Your dedication, commitment, and deep love for humanity are not. Those of us who know you realize what you have to do yourself to get through the day sometimes, and to force yourself to make this walk takes courage and determination few of us understand. There have been many benefits to my life from blogging, and the most profound has been getting to know you. I am not in a dark place, I have never contemplated suicide, but I know that if ever the curtain were to begin to close you are the one I would turn to. It has been a deeply moving part of my life to get to know you, and I am a better person for it. With much love - David
ReplyDeleteDavid M. Gascoigne: Thank you. Your comment moves me to tears. I hope you never ever find yourself in the dark places but if you do I would be glad to help if I could.
DeleteI am always touched by this walk you take every year.
ReplyDeleteLike many others I have never been in a place where continuing to breathe is painful, and I hope neither I nor any of my loved ones ever are.
But I also know that darkness and hopelessness can overwhelm anyone and I have nothing but empathy for their struggles. How wonderful that there are folks like you who give their time to listen.
Anonymous: Thank you. It is both a very moving walk, and often very beautiful. It is a privilege to be invited into people's lives and allowed to listen.
DeleteLove how beautiful and serene this post is! Enjoy the week!
ReplyDeleteaussie aNNie: Thank you. It was a sombre morning but you are right, it was also beautiful.
DeleteYour photos are beautiful. You are a really loving giving person. Look after yourself there.
ReplyDeleteMargaret D: Blogger has obviously taken against you and River. I often have to rescue you from the spam folder. Thank you. We were brought up to believe we had an obligation to contribute to the community, and volunteering with LL is so very right for me.
DeleteBless you for your work my friend. These pictures are heavenly. Much appreciated. Aloha!
ReplyDeleteCloudia: Beauty sustains me, and I hope it also touched the others who walked.
DeleteEn principios agradecerte la gran labor que haces a personas que lo necesita.
ReplyDeleteTe puedo decir que una de mis hijas que es Educadora social, e Integradora social, y que trabaja para el SAMUR en España, y que además ha creado particularmente una asociación de ayuda a la mujer y a los más desfavorecidos, donde también se les presentan casos de suicidios; me ha comentado en varias ocasiones el aumento de personas sobre todo de 15 a 25 años, que intenta suicidarse en este país, además de que está subiendo anualmente desde la pandemia un 10%., y aún así creo que no llegamos a los niveles que ustedes tienen, pero ya empieza a ser preocupante por lo que el Gobierno ha creado un nuevo plan nacional de prevención del suicidio.
Muy importante que hayas traído este tema a debate, porque hay que remover conciencias, y tu, lo has conseguido.
Un abrazo, amiga.
Manuel: Thank you for telling me about your daughter's work. All praise to her. I firmly believe that this is a subject that needs to be in the open, and hope against hope that we will be able to bring this epidemic under control.
DeleteYour walk seems both hopeful and peaceful. I think empty chairs a better symbol than lit candles - this is probebly a "me" thing. Well done for doing this walk.
ReplyDeleteThe only way to tame Blogger is to upload photos one at at time, sadly.
Charlotte (MotherOwl): I agree with you about the empty chairs. New Zealand featured the empty shoes of those who had left us which I also found very moving. I was wondering whether selecting the photos in reverse order would work but suspect you are right. Sigh.
DeleteSuicide is a lonely and tragic way to die. There's always hope in another day. I retired from a school district as the school social worker. We had yearly trainings on helping students navigate depression and preventing suicide. We had students complete suicide. There is nothing worse than losing children.
ReplyDeleteT. Powell Coltrin: I am sure that some of your work was confronting and heart breaking. Thank you.
DeleteThis is such a well written post. I am impressed with the work that you do. Your photos of starting your walk in the dark to ending up in broad daylight are outstanding. Thank you so much.
ReplyDeletegigi-hawaii: Thank you. Starting our walk in the dark and progressing to a bright and beautiful day is a powerful symbol isn't it?
DeleteI'm so with you through the darkness, friend. Thank you beyond words.
ReplyDeleteRawknrobyn: I know this is a cause dear to your heart as well and am so sorry that you are facing dark times of your own at the moment.
DeleteThis is such an important post.. thank you for sharing.
ReplyDeleteHena Tayeb: Thank you. It is an issue that is very dear to me and I put up a similar post each and every year.
DeleteHaving known two people in my life who have taken that ultimate step, I am forever grateful for these hotlines and volunteers like you. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for all you do my friend. Your post and your photos are wonderful!
ReplyDeleteDeniseinVA: Too many people know this particular sadness. I am so sorry that you are one of them, and thank you.
DeleteI've known several people who committed suicide and I know how hard it is for the family and freinds. Thank you for all that you do to try and help those in need.
ReplyDeleteMary Kirkland: I knew you had faced this pain, and that you have had thoughts of suicide yourself. I hope you are in a much, much better place these days.
DeleteI am, thank you.
DeleteMary Kirkland: Thank you for letting me know. I am glad.
DeleteA hugely profound post EC and thank you for your efforts and all you do to bring awareness to this and your work at LL. I came close to suicide myself and sadly know quite a few who went beyond close and are grieved to this day by all who loved them. Love the messages on those posters. I ask others about how they are doing and listen intently to the answers when the response is uncertain. We never know.
ReplyDeleteXO
WWW
Wisewebwoman: Thank you. As you know I came very close myself, which is part of the reason this is a cause very dear to my heart. Listening, really listening is incredibly powerful - and healing.
DeleteVery moving and so important to reach out to people who have lost their way. My faith keeps me my feet on this Earth. I had a very dear friend who chose the take his own life and it was painful to learn about this and know he was no longer in this world. I miss him to this day.
ReplyDeleteRasmaSandra: Your friend will be forever missed and mourned. I am sorry.
DeleteI know that darkness but I'm very fortunate. The last couple of years I've seen the light far more often than the dark. Stay as far away from the darkness as you can, my love.
ReplyDeleteLove,
Janie
Janie Junebug: Thank you. I spend much less time in the dark places than I did and hope to keep others away from them too.
DeleteLike that waterbody and its surrounding.
ReplyDeleteHaddock: It is a man-made lake but I think it is beautiful.
DeleteStunning photographs and a powerful metaphor for the work of suicide prevention. Thank you for all the work you do, surmounting you own personal challenges. Can't put my admiration into words.
ReplyDeleteIndia is sadly a suicide hub, nearly one quarter of the worldwide suicides happen here. And it is rising. WHO calls it a serious public health challenge. Turns my brain inside out. Several of my schoolmates have lost young teenage/20 something family members to it since the pandemic started. How to pick up the pieces after something like that.
Nilanjana Bose: Thank you. I didn't realise that the numbers in India are so high and my heart aches for everyone affected. Picking up the pieces is never easy. Never ever.
DeleteThat first photo of the bridge at night is especially beautiful.
ReplyDeleteHugs Sandra sandracox.blogspot.com
Sandra Cox: It is a beautiful spot to start the walk from isn't it?
DeleteYes indeed:) S.
DeleteI'm so glad you were able to take part in the important event. I work with high school-aged students and every year we have at least one student who expresses the sentiment or worse. It's beyond pain what you feel when you see some of our youth feeling so helpless. If only we could make them see through our eyes, how much worth and value they add to the world.
ReplyDeletemail4rosey: Thank you. If only we could convince everyone, young and old that they have worth.
DeleteLook at that rainbow.
ReplyDeleteHugs, Sandra sandracox.blogspot.com
Sandra Cox: That emerging light did have a rainbow effect didn't it? And rainbows are ALWAYS welcome.
DeleteEn primer lugar te felicito por tu trabajo y más aun, porque de acuerdo a lo que dices, tu pasas o has pasado tambien momentos sumamente dificiles en donde el suicidio pudo haber sido considerado una opcion. Siento que hoy en todas partes del mundo hay mucha gente que se encuentra en situaciones desesperadas, a veces es la falta de trabajo, la soledad, la falta de una relacion de pareja, la lejania de los hijos...las causas son multiples...pero sobre todo creo que lo mas importante es no tener un proposito personal, la desvalorizacion de uno mismo...y ese apoyo , supongo que se consigue en las terapias, cuando la persona esta muy afectada. Las familias no siempre pueden ser el mejor apoyo, a veces no saben como proceder. Pero esta bueno que tengamos conciencia que muchas veces una sola palabra puede salvar una vida.. una charla,,...dedicarle unos minutos a una persona que necesite ser escuchada.. Te dejo un fuerte abrazo y ojala siempre toda la gente encuentre apoyo .
ReplyDeleteeli mendez: Thank you so much for this long comment. You are right, the causes that lead people to consider suicide are many. Having a safe place to be heard and understood never goes astray.
DeleteWhat a wonderful post, Sue! Thanks for providing so much information. And kudos to you for going on the walk, even when it's difficult and painful for you. Your work and the work of so many others is critical. I have contemplated suicide throughout my life starting in my mid-teens. Even now I have days when it hits me, although the compulsion isn't as powerful as it was, and I can and do turn to Terry. My father did attempt suicide, at least once but survived, fortunately. I talk about it because it sheds light on my dark times and reminds me that I can get past them, and maybe it will help someone else too. Hugs to you, my friend! xox
ReplyDeleteFundy Blue: I suspect that many more people consider suicide than admit it. And yes, those voices can be very strong. I am glad that you have Terry to turn to, and that your father survived. Thank you - and hugs back to you.
DeleteThis post is very powerful. As I read I had chills head to toe. I've known too many people that took their own life. Some I know slightly, a few more closely. It makes all who knew you or of you question. How did I not know they were having problems, why didn't they feel they could seek help etc. It's such a complicated situation and the ripple effects as you say reach so many. The walk is a wonderful way to remember, to spread the word. I'm glad you're able to participate and that more and more people do. Blessings to you all. Thank you for sharing this.
ReplyDeleteSandy: Thank you. I suspect that one part of the problem is that we (and men particularly) are taught that to say that we need help is weak. And bad. It takes an incredible amount of strength in our culture to admit that we are struggling and seems like an admission of failure. I know that I am quite skilled at concealing just how bad I feel, and when I have seriously considered suicide I have thought that those around me would be better off if I was gone.
DeleteDear Sue, what a wonderful job you and other connected to the Hotline and this particular walk are doing. I've never posted about this on my own blog, but my husband took his own life here in the Berg, where we had retired. I found him. I don't feel as though it's affected me because I had to scoop up the ball as it dropped, tuck it under my arm and run. And I am still running. I was left with nothing but through grace and wonderful friends and the community I live in, I have made it alone. Thank you for this incredible post. Jo
ReplyDeleteJo: Thank you for telling me this. I suspect that having to be very busy helped, but I am sure that it has affected you. And run you have, both before and after his death.
DeleteThis is such a touching and meaningful endeavor. I'm impressed that you do the walk despite the challenges, but putting myself in your shoes as best I can, I think you might miss it very much if you didn't go. Some things are like that - hard to do, in one way, and harder not to do, in quite another way. I'm glad you can still do it, and want you to know that even through your blog post each year you are raising awareness, in me at least. Possibly more so this year as I struggle for the first time ever with low mood and thoughts of hopelessness. (I am coming out of that now, finally.)
ReplyDeleteDear EC, thank you for all you do for others. You remind me of the motto of Rotarians, a group my husband belonged to and lived the words, "Service before self". xx
jenny_o: You are so very right. It is hard to do, but would be so very much harder if/when I am forced to give it up. I am so sad that you know that dreadful hopeless feeling and ecstatic that you are coming out of it. Much love dear friend.
Delete