Except it wasn't a dog.
It was a cat.
And it wasn't my homework, but a library book.
This is the culprit. Jazz. Looking totally innocent. Of course.
I really didn't enjoy telling the librarian that I was returning a damaged book. It isn't the first time either. I had to replace a book a friend lent me because Captain Psychotic decided to shred it. He leaves my books alone though.
Which is fortunate. I wouldn't want him to be totally exhausted.
There are less books in the house than there were (I have just completed a cull) but still too many. Another obsession.
It was a cat.
And it wasn't my homework, but a library book.
This is the culprit. Jazz. Looking totally innocent. Of course.
I really didn't enjoy telling the librarian that I was returning a damaged book. It isn't the first time either. I had to replace a book a friend lent me because Captain Psychotic decided to shred it. He leaves my books alone though.
Which is fortunate. I wouldn't want him to be totally exhausted.
There are less books in the house than there were (I have just completed a cull) but still too many. Another obsession.
Bad Jazz!
ReplyDeleteRight there with ya. We're down to 6 bookcases in the house.
Sandra Cox: We still have more than six bookcases. Several of them double stacked.
DeleteHa! Yup, mine are double stacked too.
DeleteIs there such a thing as too many books?
ReplyDeleteCountryMum: I am told there is.
DeleteAbsolutely not! No such thing. The only real problem is not enough space to put them.
DeleteRiver: Sadly we ran out of room a long time ago.
DeleteHe must dislike the smell of strangers in his domain. A neighbour once lent us a book very precious to her and our dog chewed it. She was good about it and said to just keep the book and we did and still have it 40 years later.
ReplyDeleteAndrew: He doesn't like strangers. At all. Growls at them (and visitors have asked if our dog is safe) and scuttles away. He never attacks the second hand books I bring home though. He is a rule unto himself.
Delete"dog" - hee hee
DeleteSometimes, I wake in the dead of night and wonder how I come to be living in a house with NO BOOKCASES. Books here live in closets, desk drawers, boxes,on a shelf in the pantry...in a ballycumber, which you'll know if you have The Meaning of Liff on your shelf.
ReplyDeletedinahmow: We too have books in boxes, tables, the floor. And several bookcases. Over ten bookcases.
Deleteballycumber?
DeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
Deletehttps://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Meaning_of_Liff
Deleteyou just can't trust a cat
ReplyDeleteAuthor R. Mac Wheeler: Your prejudices are showing. Jazz can indeed be trusted - to do exactly what he wants.
DeleteMaybe that's Jazz's way of saying you should read aloud sometimes. You can never have too many books, just too little space to put them.
ReplyDeleteMason Canyon: We definitely don't have room for our books. Sigh. I wonder whether he would like to be read to, and which books he would choose.
DeleteBet the librarian wasn't happy.
ReplyDeletedonna baker: She was surprisingly good about it. Librarians see a lot. One years ago told me she often found banana peel used as bookmarks. Eeeuw.
DeleteMust be the smell...
ReplyDeleteAlex J. Cavanaugh: I suppose so. Or natural perversity.
DeleteThe literary culprit! She could read in a past life is my guess! Lol.
ReplyDeleteMarie Smith: Perhaps. In this life Jazz would limit himself to picture books. Nudes and/or food I suspect.
Deletebut BEAUTIFULLY guilty
ReplyDeleteAnnie ODyne: He is that. Lucky for him. His purr is special too.
DeleteDear EC
ReplyDeleteNaughty Jazz! It's a good job he is so gorgeous! I'm absolutely with you on the obsession. In fact, I should have a sign which reads 'If you want the best seat in the house, you'll have to move the pile of books...' I ran out of space a while ago, but does this stop me? No. Not too many books, just not enough bookshelves/bookcases!
I keep having a sort out and donating some to charity, but somehow it doesn't seem to make any difference...*sigh*
Best wishes
Ellie
Ellie Foster: No, the donations don't seem to make a difference. Sigh. And I find culling very, very hard. Himself finds it impossible. Which irritates me, because having read a book he won't reread it, but can't surrender it either.
DeleteI am in the process of culling my books. My house runs over with books and they collect dust, and I am allergic to dust so I need to let them go. But it is so, so hard to do.
DeleteIt would be hard to stay mad with him!
ReplyDeletekylie: He knows that. He plays on that.
DeleteIs Jazz on half rations?
ReplyDeleteJoanne Noragon: He probably should be. However he tells us (often) that he is ALWAYS underprivileged and underfed. The truth is not in him.
DeleteWhat a handsome rascal, though :)
ReplyDeleteOne of our cats is a bit aggressive and likes to rip up paper, envelopes, boxes - anything she can get her teeth into. I think it makes her feel better. The problem is that she can't tell the difference between the box I leave on the floor for her to chew on and the client papers my husband leaves beside the computer. I can't train the cat, so I'm left trying to train the husband :)
jenny_o: Jazz is a box destroyer too. I am always a bit awed at how fast he can reduce solid cardboard boxes into soggy confetti. Good luck on the husband training. I suspect I would be no more successful than I am with the cats.
DeleteHi EC,
ReplyDeleteI've got photographic evidence of my cat eating my newspaper.
You'll find it on my now defunct photo blog:
http://plasmanceye.blogspot.co.uk/2009/03/cat-ate-my-newspaper.html
What naughty creatures they are!
:o)
Cheers
PM
Plastic Mancunian: Oh yes, newspapers, envelopes and cardboard boxes are fair game. Sigh on the book front though. And I really am grateful that this is an occasional aberration.
DeleteEC I know your cat behaviour was not fair but I love it
ReplyDeleteGosia k: Jazz will be pleased to have supporters.
DeleteJazz does not look the least bit bothered about your book. No shame in his game. LOL!
ReplyDeleteTerri @ Coloring Outside the Lines: Jazz doesn't do guilt. Or shame. Which I envy.
DeleteMy old kitty was a fan of records. :( At least Jazz likes to read? :D
ReplyDeleteBea: Ouch. Even a tentative attack on a record could have dire results. Books are (mostly) still readable.
DeleteLOL! Jazz wants ALL your attention! :)
ReplyDeleteCloudia: You could be right. He doesn't share well. With me, or with Jewel.
DeleteOh dear. Sammy chews newspapers, magazines, the corners of books, tissues (rips them into shreds and leaves them all over the floor)... On the other hand, Manu the Jack Russell is perfectly behaved. Sigh.
ReplyDeleteAlexia: There is no telling is there? On the positive side, Jazz is not a food thief. Rare in the cats who have shared our lives. Very rare.
DeleteOh oh. Sounds like Jazz is saying something
ReplyDeleteMartin Kloess: Jazz is often saying something. And I am pretty certain that some of the things he says mean his mouth should be washed out.
DeleteNaughty Jazz! Perhaps he smells the scent of others on these books and is 'protecting' you from possible intruders?
ReplyDeleteIf postage wasn't so expensive you could cull a few books my way, then I could send them on and they would become travellers, much the same way as books left at bus stops or in interstate bus depot waiting rooms. you "borrow" the book, read it, then leave it for someone else to find and read.
River: I wish postage was less expensive. Much less. If I knew you would like a book I would happily post it, but it is too dear to take a risk. I do like the concept of travelling books though.
DeleteI didn't know cats would do this! Sure looks innocent and sweet!
ReplyDeleteBookie: Quite a number of cats are paper chewers - see Alexis's comment. Jazz is powerful though. And yes, he does look innocent.
DeleteNow that I've read what everyone else has to say, my comment is somewhat redundant, but I'll let it stand.
ReplyDeleteand add that my Angel has no interest in books at all, not for reading or for shredding. Doesn't steal food either, although he will jump up onto the table when he hears my spoon scraping up the last of my icecream, he knows I'll give him the last little bit.
River: Your Angel is not only beautiful, but has a nice nature too. Jazz doesn't shows no interest in icecream, or indeed in 'people food'.
Deletehaha - I have a bird that likes to eat paper if I leave a book around she will nibble on it.
ReplyDeleteTruedessa: For some reason, this seems to be more reasonable than Jazz's fondness for the printed word. Still aggravating though.
DeleteMoving to a new house revealed boxes of books that had been in my husband's office. It was painful, but we are culling with some success. My brother Bill didn't turn in his English homework, and the teacher (whom I knew well) asked where it was. Bill told her his horse ate it. Then he showed her the English book, with a big horse bite.
ReplyDeleteSusan Kane: Culling books hurts doesn't it? However necessary. Love the horse eating homework. A twist on a familiar tale.
DeleteNorbert loved this post. He sends his love/hate to Jazz the Destroyer.
ReplyDeleteBirdie: Of course Norbert loved the post. And Jazz returns his love/hate.
DeleteI know I shouldn't laugh, I really do...but I really did! :)
ReplyDeletePerhaps you should present Jazz with his own laptop...he might be a frustrated author and is taking his frustrations out on the published works!
Jazz is a beautiful boy. :)
Lee: He is beautiful. He needs to be beautiful. And if Jazz could write I am pretty certain it would require an R rating. At least.
DeleteWho me? Do you have proof?
ReplyDeleteMolly Bon: Yes. I caught you in the act. And very pleased with yourself you were.
DeleteIt's why I don't check out books from the library! Bad Jazz!
ReplyDeleteStrayer: I confessed my sins (his sins), and you need have no fear. And neither do any of the library patrons.
DeleteMy goodness do you have anymore books left in your house apart from the ones you mentioned this morning in my blog post?
ReplyDeleteNot had a cat shred a book but one peed on one once - that certainly went out the door quick smart!
Cathy: There are lots and lots and lots of books left.
DeleteI had a cat piddle on a tapestry I was working on once. He wasn't popular. And I wasn't game to wash it for fear of losing the pattern. I aired it, and completed it (cursing him all the while). And THEN washed it. They haven't defiled books in that way though.
Did they believe you when you said the cat did it.
ReplyDeleteI have to get rid of some of my books too I'm running out of places to put them.
Merle.............
Merlesworld: They did. There were rather a lot of sharp pointy teeth marks.
DeleteOf course it would be Jazz. Of course. Little darling.
ReplyDeleteWe got a kitten (black and white -- looks like a little Dom-- been waiting to tell you but was waiting until I had some pics loaded on my computer to share...!). She is turning out to be a book/paper/anything-she-can-get-her-teeth-and-paws-on shredder. And yells at me a lot. But I'm falling in love. What can you do.
I do love Jazz's regal look on the chair. He would never, ever do anything bad. Ever.
PS I envy you your cull. Brave. I have no room. Book in piles everywhere!
DeletePaper Chipmunk (aka Ellen): I am really looking forward to seeing photos of little Ms Destructo when you are ready. And of course you love them. It is their survival technique.
DeleteDon't envy me too much. There are still piles. Everywhere.
We went through our book shelf earlier in the year and we were brutal. It's not an easy thing to do.
ReplyDeleteRick Watson: Not easy at all. A start has been made, and more needs to be done here.
Delete.A literary cat with a 'hunger for knowledge'.. We had a black and white that chewed the corner of my night stand..
ReplyDeleteThat table stands as a permanent reminder of him.
only slightly confused: Jazz has a hunger for destruction. He hasn't (yet) chewed the furniture and I won't let him read your comment.
DeleteI have never met a cat who is a book eater but some of ours also had some strange tastes!! Have a good day Diane
ReplyDeleteRhodesia ~ Diane: He didn't eat it precisely. Chewed it, shredded it, and spat it out. Avocado was perhaps the strangest food fad our cats have developed though one (once) did eat a piece of pineapple core.
DeleteI didn't know cats ever ate books. Learn something new every day. :-)
ReplyDeleteDJan: Jazz is a rule unto himself. In every thing.
DeleteGreat that you can get rid of some of your books. I had to do that when I moved. One advantage to buying second hand books (eg. Thrift Shop) I can read them, then donate them again! But, it is hard, to give up the books!
ReplyDeleteSienna Smythe: I find giving up books very, very hard. And himself finds it even more difficult. I buy second hand books but find it so difficult to relinquish them.
DeleteHe's a voracious eater...uh, reader. ;) What an innocent looking face! Did he try to blame Jewel?
ReplyDeleteRiver Fairchild: He was caught in the act. Jewel is a thief rather than a destroyer. She is particularly good at absconding with my earrings. And discarding them under furniture. Heavy furniture.
DeleteHe's like my second son--I mean in the book destruction zone. I can't tell you how many books I've lost to that child. It's depressing.
ReplyDeleteCrystal Collier: Oh dear. That WOUlD be depressing. Hopefully he will grow out of it though - which Jazz won't.
DeleteYour cat is beautiful and looks very innocent. Are you sure it was him that ate the book?
ReplyDeleteGlenda Council Beall: I am very sure it was him. I walked in on him while he was in the act. He looked up at me, yawned and continued. He needs to be beautiful.
DeleteHe couldn't help it, he saw a good book and had to have it.
ReplyDeleteCaitlin Lane: He can never help anything. I do understand bookie lust though.
DeleteWoops.
ReplyDeleteBob Bushell: And grrrr.
DeleteThank you EC, this made me smile. Thank you also for the sweet comments while I was offline.
ReplyDeleteDeniseinVA: I hope you are feeling much, much better.
DeleteBeautiful cat, I do love black ones.
ReplyDeleteMargaret-whiteangel: He is. Both our current cats are black, and I have had black cats since I was a child.
DeleteMy ferret used to be bad about that. He'd steal books and hide them from me. Sometimes he'd even shred them and make them into nests. haha
ReplyDeleteRobert Bennett: That would be a problem - though at least the ferret was using the books and not just destroying them.
DeleteHard to be mad at that precious face for chewing on good books.
ReplyDeleteYou're so well organized. I'm impressed by all the culling.
Rawknrobyn: Just call me hard-hearted. I find it very easy to be mad at that face.
DeleteAnd wish I was organised.
Mine sits on every book I try to read and puts his face all over the Kindle when I use that. So far, no chewing or shredding...sad today and wary...
ReplyDeletee: I am familiar with the sitting thing. And not surprised you are sad and wary. Hugs.
DeleteAh . . . the innocence of a cat.
ReplyDeleteLon Anderson: Much as I love him (and I do) there is not an innocent cell in Jazz's body. And he doesn't care.
DeleteI believe you Elephant's Child, my comment before your reply to me was just a pun on my part, anyway . . . I just want you to know I have a new blog once again seeing I didn't like who I was in my other blog that I deleted, but now I'm much happier than I was before, you're welcome to stop by if you'd like, just click on my name and you'll be taken there.
DeleteLon Anderson: I am glad you are feeling happier. Long may it continue.
DeleteI remember so well the rewards vs. not-so-rewarding aspects of being a cat owner. I do still love cats, but shouldn't have one because of my allergy to pet hair and dander. But I enjoy seeing yours - even when one of them is bad. :)
ReplyDeleteWish I could go through those books - I have an addiction, as well.
Lynn: I know about your book addiction. I essentially culled books I won't read again. And am (of course) already regretting some decisions.
DeleteSuch a beautiful cat. How could such a precious animal be destructive. Oh yes, now I know. 5 cats, two dogs, etc. Don't take your eyes off them. LOL
ReplyDeleteGranny Annie: I was watching this act of destruction. And he didn't care. The damage was reduced because I was there and could take the book away. Sigh.
DeleteNaughty cat with evil in his eyes. So that's what is meant by "digesting a book".
ReplyDeleteIn England black cats are lucky.
Here in Canada they are considered bad luck.... what is the opinion in Australia?
Shammickite: There is some prejudice against them. Not shared in this house. I believe they are less likely to be adopted, but both of our black beauties came from shelters. And have enriched our lives.
DeleteThose darn cats! Franky knocked my kitchen valiance down. sigh.
ReplyDeleteSandra Cox: Franky was working on the if at first you don't succeed keep trying principle wasn't he? Very, very familiar here.
DeleteOoh Aah .. mind, my cat is likely to just pee on anything lying about .. but not my ballycumbers 📚 🛌
ReplyDeleteWhere do you get those book boxes?
carol in cairns: We had a cat who piddled on things too. He defiled visitors suitcases on a regular basis - despite all our warnings to keep the door closed. He was known as 'bucket bladder'.
DeleteThe boxes come with some of my medication. And hold a surprising number of books. I can collapse them until they are needed.
They are perfect examples of recycling then. Pity you couldn't find another purpose for the medication itself x
Deletecarol in cairns: This particular medication is injected - not a skill I ever thought I would need to acquire. And yes, I would indeed like to find another purpose for it. Or have it become unnecessary.
DeleteOh dear, he obviously has it in for having property brought into the house that is alien. He needs you to have a serious word with him. Or stop borrowing books.
ReplyDeleteFriko: Stop borrowing books!!!! Wash your mouth out. Words have been said. Whether he listened is a different issue.
DeleteOh, I just had to stop by ... when I saw your post title, I thought I wonder how many teachers had heard that excuse! LOL!
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed your post, thanks.
All the best Jan
Lowcarb team member: Welcome and thank you. I am sure that many teachers have heard this line. And some less probable.
DeleteOh Jazz! What a sweet face.
ReplyDeleteLady Fi: Appearances can be deceiving. Though when he is good (like the girl with a curl) he is very, very good.
DeleteOh, bad. But look at that innocent face.
ReplyDeleteLux G.: Jazz is very rarely innocent. When he is asleep. Perhaps.
DeleteSilly Jazz. My Sid hasn't once looked at a book. His favorite past time is sharpening his claws on furniture that has wooden legs or such. It is interesting that he even leaves wooden bookcases alone. Guess he isn't into reading only dreaming. Sid sends his meows in greeting to Jazz.
ReplyDeleteRasma Raisters: Jazz does a bit of furniture shredding too. And also flexes his claws in door ways.
DeleteThank Sid from us.
Oh Jazz. Oreo and Gelato have homemade ways to create fun and mischief too. I love the look in Jazz's eyes. Such strong, proud, secure self esteem. Does Jazz have a loud purr too? Just out of curiosity what was the genre. I have a few books that I have read that could be shredded. ;)
ReplyDeleteGinger Dawn Harman: Jazz has a REALLY loud purr. When he came to us he was named Jazzpurr. Which made me feel unwell.
DeleteThe book he got to was a murder mystery. Not brilliant - but certainly not worth shredding.
One of our cats sometimes makes confetti out of paper and cardboard, but neither of them has ever messed with any of my books. Thank goodness. I must have a bazillion books around here. (That'd make a LOT of confetti!) I should follow your example and do some book-culling, too, but it is soooooo hard to part with a book.
ReplyDeleteSusan: I hear you on the bazillion book front. All the bookshelves are full. Many are double stacked. There are books on the floor. And on most flat surfaces (the bathroom sink is book free). And you are right about the difficulties of culling. It hurts.
DeleteJazz sounds like a naughty kitty- but so cute. :) Glad your books are left alone and awesome job getting rid of some of them.
ReplyDelete~Jess
DMS ~ Jess: He is naughty. And much loved. Surrendering the books hurt. And was a drop in the bucket of what needs to be done.
DeleteBook Artist Ellen Golla made a piece of work called the Literary Cure, which involved eating books in capsule format. Maybe that was what the cat was trying to do? ;-) They are lot more intelligent than we think :-)
ReplyDeletehttps://www.flickr.com/photos/zebracrossing/6191046970/in/album-72157613229160365/
Angela: All animals are more intelligent that we give them credit for. I have one of Ellen's capsules and even much loved Jazz would be in trouble if he he damages it.
DeleteWow! Lucky you - it is a beautiful piece of work. I ended up having a dream about it! I told Ellen :-)
DeleteAngela: I have, and treasure, several pieces of Ellen's work. Such a creative and clever soul.
DeleteHappy Weekend!
ReplyDeleteSandra Cox: Thank you.
DeleteNoooooooooooooooo.
ReplyDeleteJazz is quite sassy or should I say Jassy!
What a naughty boy!
MEOWwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.
My Inner Chick: He is. Interspersed with periods of being loving, and a 'butter wouldn't melt' cat.
DeleteWhat do you do with all those books you get rid of? Scully chews paper a little, but all the cats usually do in regard to books is to smell them and then to rub against them to mark them with their scent.
ReplyDeleteSnowbrush: I donate the books I cull to the crisis centre I volunteer with. Book fairs make up quite a large part of the funding for the centre. Sadly, I also go to the bookfairs - and buy more books.
DeleteThere is scent marking here too, but Jazz moves into destructo mode from time to time.
St. Vinnie's had a half price book sale on Monday, so, much to Peggy's horror, I bought 17 more cat books in one fell swoop.
DeleteSnowbrush: A half price book sale would have caused me to fall from grace too. Badly.
DeleteWhat a cute scallycat. As a pup my youngest golden retriever chewed the spines from books on the lowest shelves. Thinking of this reminds me of a high school teacher who used to say 'read, learn and inwardly digest' - I always loathed the expression. I've just researched the phrase and it seems to be biblical, what a surprise.
ReplyDeleteKim: So many familiar expressions do have their roots in the bible. My decidedly non-religous father used to quote that one. Some days scallycat is much too kind an expression for Jazz.
DeleteI think Andrew if right...it is the smell of strangers on the books he attacks. Maybe if you have books from others you could pop them in a zip plastic bag.
ReplyDeleteI rid out house of so many books over the years but we still have a 6ft bookcase full and I bought 3 new ones last week. I used to get books from the library but I now find they seem to have ebooks and I don't have a reader so have to buy from the stores which is annoying.
Mimsie: I don't think so. He has never attacked the second hand books I bring home. Natural perversity.
DeleteDid you know that you can get a free reader so that you can read ebooks on your computer?